Searching for a cigarette, I raided my closet and found three empty packs of Malboro. Then I remembered one stick in my shorts pocket and took it from there. This has to be the last one, I promised. But I know tomorrow, it’s time to buy another pack. So recently I’ve been so impressed with the direction of a Philippine TV series called My Husband’s Lover.

It’s about gay love and infidelity between the traditional couple. Vince, a married guy with two children, gets back with former partner Eric, and of course, it complicates everything. No, I’m not thrilled that this case happens in real life. Yet the director and actors’ skills have completely blown me away.Also the fact that the story is utterly based on reality no matter how they twist it. The possibility of it being similar to real gay life and relationships is huge. I’m always excited to see what happens next. There is no way any woman not experiencing what Vincent’s wife is going through can truly say that she can empathize with the female character. Well, maybe a little but not a hundred percent. I want to know how wives would feel if they were in this exact situation- their husbands having lovers who aren’t women, but men.

I would burst into hysteria. A hysterical kind of laugh, mostly insulting and in disdain. A mixture of shock and amusement. I’m sorry, this is a serious issue but no woman in the right mind should ever feel insecure about herself if bumped into this situation. If she never loses her mind, that is. However, as wife and mother, she has every reason to fear a broken marriage. A broken marriage caused be the husband being gay and having an affair with another gay man. For the sake of the kids, she’d normally fight for their family. She might even offer to help him overcome his gayness, as if it was the same as depression or a horrible outfit. I think the one who needs to overcome anything is the wife herself. Keep wondering why he would choose another guy over you and you’ll be wasting your time. Homosexuality could be something hereditary, not that it’s in their DNA but pink blood is the best imagery we can think of. Gayness is not synonymous to foolishness or temporary insanity. It is a sexual orientation, a preference, and most of all, it’s in their hearts.Think about it not as a disease but an emotion. Feelings move every character in My Husband’s Lover. That’s why Vince got back with Eric. That’s how they became more than friends. And you can see how emotions drive the wife. And as a wife, you have every right to do whatever it takes to make your husband stay. Yet not as dictated by emotions but with applied common sense. The legitimacy of your marriage and welfare of the children are enough reasons for you to make it work. the thing is, you can’t do it all by yourself.

It could be damaging to your ego if he refuses to let the affair go. His choice, not yours. Instead of asking yourself what you did wrong, be confident that you’re a woman. No way that it could be your loss. No way that you wouldn’t make it through. If he leaves, then it’s his shit to deal with in the future. If he asks you for help, offer him compassion.You can’t judge him ,girl. You’re not perfect. Be charming, dress well, and treat him with kindness i lieu of scheming revenge. Don’t even feel like there’s any competition. If you can’t be happy, think of all the things to be thankful for. Surely, life can’t be that bad. Most of all, pay. Pray that your husband will be strong enough to fight off his temptations. If you’re in pain that he kept secrets from you, shove it. Pain is never permanent. Family is for keeps. Love makes anything possible.

  • Maria Teresa Figuerres

    I would have wanted to watch this every day if not for my very busy work and home schedules. An interesting show with a good storyline (plus talented actors) is really worth watching.

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